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d o you p e e
Heya baldi i'm back, i heard you were looking for me, and sorry if you cant find my discord i deleted it : ( I had to move to my moms house and take care of her because she got a concusion and she needed a lot of my help, i missed you, and i will be waiting in speedpaint multidraw for you : ) -you're good friend Virgil
Shawty's like :flushed::b: a :moneybag::rofl: :bee: :100::moneybag: melody in :point_down: :clap: :clock1: :person_frowning::skull: my :dollar::man: :sunglasses: :person_raising_hand: :person_gesturing_no::fire: :grinning::telephone: head :head_ban
tf why are we spamming shet on peoples pages aisjdojsajd
ESPECIALLY SCRIPTS FROM MOVIES MORONS
Cassidy: What's your name again?
Chrissie Watkins: Chrissie!
Cassidy: Where are we going?
Cassidy: Slow up, slow down! I'm not drunk! Slow down! Wait I'm coming! I'm
coming! I'm definitely
coming! Wait, slow up! I can swim -- just can't walk or dress myself.
Chrissie: Come on in the water!
Cassidy: Take it easy. Take it easy.
Chrissie: Oh! God help me! God! Argh! God help!
Cassidy: I'm coming... I'm coming.
Chrissie: It hurts! It hurts! Oh my god! God help me! God please help!
Martin Brody: How come the sun didn't use to shine in here.
Ellen Brody: We bought the house in the fall, this is summer.
Ellen: Somebody feed the dogs, huh?
Ellen: See the kids?
Martin: They must be in the backyard.
Ellen: In Amity, you say: yahd.
Martin: There in the yahd, not too fah from the cah. How's that?
Ellen: Like your from New York.
Michael Brody: Mom I got cut, I got bit by a vampire.
Martin: You guys were playing on those swings. Weren't -[Phone rings] Stay
off them, I haven't fixed them yet!
Ellen: I think you're gonna live.
Martin: Hello, yeah ---- what the hell do they usually do, wash up or float
or what? Ah nah, nah, nah keep him there. Keep him there, I'll be out in
about fifteen... fifteen, twenty minutes. All right. Okay. Gotta go, missing
person. season hasn't started nobody's even here yet.
Ellen: Listen chief, be careful will ya?
Martin: In this town? --- Hey!
Ellen: David, lemme get on. I want my cup back!
Martin: You'll get it
Ellen: Okay. Wave good-bye. Bye!
Martin: Now nobody saw her go in the water?
Cassidy: Somebody could have. I was so passed out.
Martin: You mean she ran out on ya.
Cassidy: No sir! She must have drowned. Look I reported it to ya didn't I?
Martin: You live here?
Cassidy: Nah, Hartford. I go to Trinity. My folks live in Grenich.
Martin: Your folks were born here right?
Cassidy: Yeah, I'm an islander. They moved off when my dad retired. You an
Martin: No, New York state. You here for the summer. [Whistle] Come on! ---
Hold it. Oh Jesus.
Polly: Well your up awful early. Is the chief in there? Well chief, what have
you got on.
Martin: Polly, if this filing system is gonna work, you gotta keep that
outdated stuff off my desk - just depending, all right?
Polly: Yes chief. Now we got a bunch of calls about that karate school. It
seems the nine year olds from the school have been karateing the picket
fences. [Phone rings] Chief Brody's office? It's the medical inspector.
Polly: Now the fire chief wants you to go over the fourth of July --
Martin: Polly I want the list of all the water activities that the city
fathers are planning for today. All right.
Polly: Right away?
Martin: Hendricks, where do we keep the beach closed signs.
Hendricks: We never had any.
Citizen: Hey chief, chief, chief! I was trying to find ya chief, there's a
damn truck with New Hampshire plates on it smack in front of my store!
Martin: Just have him fill out the form. Just fill it out.
Harry: Hey, look what those kids did to my fence. 89 year old with glasses!
Martin: With glasses.
Harry: And look at this! They did it with their bare hands!
Martin: I'll call you in the afternoon , look I promise.
Customer: This stuff ain't gonna help me in August. The summer kings come
down here in June! You haven't got one thing on here I ordered. Not a beach
umbrella, not a sun lounger, no beach balls... If I can't get service from
you I'll go and get service...
Hendricks: Chief, chief! Polly sent me to find you to tell you that there's a
bunch of boy scouts out on April bay doing their mile swim for their merit
badges. I couldn't call them in there's no phones out there.
Martin: Okay, c'mon, get out of there. Take this stuff back to the office and
get to work on those signs: "Beaches Closed - No Swimming by order of the
Amity PD". And let Polly do the printing.
Hendricks: What's the matter with my printing?
Martin: Let Polly do the printing.
Vaughn: Hey! Chief! Chief Brody!
Meadows: Listen we had a shark attack at South Beach this morning mayor!
Mayor I ...
Scout Leader: K Albert! C'mon you goof keep your arms up! [Continues to yell
Martin: Charlie take me out to those kids will ya?
Vaughn: Martin? Martin, you gonna shut down the beaches on your own authority?
Martin: Well, what other authority do I need?
Meadows: Well technically you need a civic ordinance or a resolution by a
board of selectives -
Vaughn: That's just going by the book. We're really a little anxious that
you're, uh, you're rushing into something serious here. It's your first
summer you know.
Martin: What does that mean?
Vaughn: I'm only trying to say that Amity is a summer town. We need summer
dollars. If the people can't swim here they'll be glad to swim at the beaches
of Cape Cod, Hampton, Long Island.
Martin: That doesn't mean we have to serve them up a smorgasbord.
Meadows: But we never had that kind of trouble in these waters.
Martin: But what else could have done that to that girl?
Vaughn: Boat propeller?
Medical Examiner: Well, I think, uh, possibly, uh, yes a boating accident. A
Martin: That's not what you told me over the phone.
Medical Examiner: I was wrong. We'll have to amend our reports.
Martin: And you'll stand by that?
Medical Examiner: I'll stand by it.
Vaughn: Martin. A summer girl goes swimming. Swims out a little far. She
tires. A fishing boat comes along...
Meadows: It's happened before.
Vaughn: I don't think you appreciate the gut reaction people have to these
Martin: Harry, I appreciate it. I'm just reacting to what I was told!
Vaughn: Martin, i-it's all psychological. You yell `barracuda!', everybody
says `huh, what?'. You yell `shark!' and we've got a panic on our hands on
the fourth of July. --- Okay you, you can take us back now.
Alex Kintner: Mom, can I get my raft and go back out in the water?
Mrs. Kintner: Lemme see your fingers. Alex Kintner they are beginning to
Alex: Just lemme go out a little longer?
Mrs. Kintner: Just ten more minutes.
[Cuts in on conversation]
Councilwoman: It's just a big bother. Listen to me --
Ellen: All I want to know, I just want to know one simple thing. When do I
get to become an islander?
Councilwoman: Ellen, never! Never! You're not born here -- you're not an
Councilman: Hey, Marty. We got a lot of problems downtown but I got a lot of
problems at the house I wish you could take care of. One, I've got some cats
barking in front of the house, I can't get down to the office. And that
garbage truck, next to the office, has got to be moved. So we're going to use
a red zone, it's a simple thing you can take care of, you've done it before, k?
Ellen: You okay?
Martin: Yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine.
Ellen: Listen, if the kids go in the water and it's wearing you out?
Martin: No, no.
Ellen: They can... they can play out here on the beach.
Martin: All right, let'em go.
Harry: It's cold! Huh huh, we know all about you chief. You don't go in the
water at all do ya?
Martin: That's some bad hat, Harry!
Ellen: Chief Brody, you are uptight, that's good, that's it...
Sean Brody: Oh do you know the muffin man, the muffin man, the muffin man.
Pipit Owner: Pipit! C'mon Pipit, Pipit!
Witness: Did you see that?
Martin: Get everybody out! Get out! Get out!
Sean: Michael! Get outta the water!
Mrs. Kintner: Alex?! Alex?!
Meadows: Alex Kintner is the kid who was missing at the beach. His mother
says it was the sharks.
Councilwoman: We don't even know that there's a shark around here. Look I
can't argue with you; I can't talk to you! Larry! Larry! Do something here!
Martin: We have to talk to Mrs. Kintner, because this is going to turn into a
Meadows: Look it's not just the Gazette, she's advertising in out of town
papers. Now people are gonna be all over New England that are going to know
Vaughn: Let's go back to the counsel chambers where we're going to have more
Martin: Not only that but I'm responsible for public safety around here.
Vaughn: Then go out there tomorrow and see that no one gets hurt.
Councilwoman: Martin! Martin! Do something here --
Meadows: It's a small story, I'm going to bury it as deep as I can; the ad is
going to run in the back along with the grocery ads.
Vaughn: Right in here please. Move on in, please.
Councilwoman: Look, I have a point of view and I think it speaks for many of
the people here. Not only me because I have a motel, how do you feel?
Vaughn: Please! Let's have some order! Let's have order please! Any special
Chairmember: Uh, is that 3000 dollar bounty on the shark in cash or check?
Councilwoman: I don't think that's funny; I don't think that's funny at all.
Vaughn: All right! All right! That's private business between you fisherman
and Mrs. Kintner. Martin... would you please? Chief Brody.
Martin: Uh, I just... Uh, I just wanna tell you what we're planning so far...
Town member: What about the beaches chief?
Martin: We're gonna to put on the summer... the extra summer deputies as soon
as possible. And then we're gonna try and use, uh, shark spotters on the
Councilwoman: Are you going to close the beaches?
Martin: Yes we are. We're also planning to bring in some experts from the
Oceanographic Institute on the mainland.
Vaughn: Only 24 hours.
Martin: I didn't agree to that?
Vaughn: Only 24 hours.
Town member: 24 hours is like 3 weeks!
[Sound of nails scratching chalkboard]
Quint: Y'all know me. Know how I earn a livin'. I'll catch this bird for ya,
but it ain't gonna be easy... Bad fish. It's not like going down to pond
chasin' blue gills or tommy cots. This shark - swallow ya hole. L'il shakin',
l'il tenderizin', down ya go. Now we gotta do it quick, that'll bring back
the tourists, that'll put all your businesses on a payin' basis. But it's not
gonna be pleasant! I value my neck a lot more than 3000 bucks chief! I'll
find him for three, but I'll catch him... and kill him... for ten! Now you
gotta make up your minds. Gonna stay alive and ante up? Or ya wanna play it
cheap, be on welfare the whole winter. I don't want no volunteers; I don't
want no mates. There's too many captains on this island. Ten thousand dollars
for me by myself. For that you get the head, the tail, the whole damn thing.
Vaughn: Thank you very much Mr. Quint. We'll, uh, we'll take it under
Quint: Mr. Mayor, chief, ladies and gentlemen.
Ellen: Oh! Oh! Oh God! You scared me!
Martin: Whoa! You know Ellen? People don't even know how old sharks are? And
I mean that they live two, three thousand years? They don't know!
Ellen: Martin, enough, enough. You not even going to be able to sleep tonight,
Ellen: Wanna get drunk and fool around?
Martin: Oh yeah.
Ellen: Hey, Mikey really loves his present.
Martin: Where is he?
Ellen: Sitting in it.
Martin: Good God! All right Michael out of the boat!
Michael: It's tied up to the jetty, just sitting in the boat!
Martin: Get outta that boat!
Michael: C'mon dad! Just a little longer!
Ellen: Martin! It's his birthday tomorrow!
Martin: I don't want him on the ocean!
Ellen: His not on the ocean, he's in a boat! He's not gonna go in the water!
I don't think he'll ever go in the water again after what happened yesterday!
Martin: All right, now don't say that. I don't want that to happen you know
that. But I want him to read the boating regulations... the rules, you know,
before he goes out on his own.
Ellen: Michael! Did you hear your father? Out of the water now! Now!
ALONG THE SHORE
Charlie: I'm tired. Let's stop, before someone reports us.
Jenwirder: Don't worry the chief lives on the other side of the island.
Charlie: Am I coming in straight.
Jenwirder: Don't worry just keep rowing.
Charlie: Better catch something, this is my wife's holiday roast!
Jenwirder: Don't worry about it. 3000 dollars buys an awful lot of roast.
Charlie: Come and get it!
Jenwirder: Tide's takin' it right out.
Charlie: Can't we go home?
[BACK AT BRODY'S DEN]
BACK ALONG THE SHORE
Charlie: Hey! Hey! He's takin' it! He's takin' it! He's takin' it! Hey! Go!
Go! Go! Go! Go!
Jenwirder: Go! Go! Go!
Jenwirder: Charlie! Take my word for it! Don't look back! Swim Charlie! Swim!
C'mon Charlie! Swim! Swim Charlie! C'mon! Come here boy! C'mon! C'mon Charlie,
swim! Come here Charlie! C'mon Charlie, keep movin'! Keep movin' Charlie!
C'mon a little more Charlie! Atta boy Charlie! Come here Charlie! Atta boy,
atta boy, atta boy Charlie!
Charlie: I can't get up! I can't get up! I can't!
Jenwirder: Give me your hand Charlie! Just give me your hand!
Charlie: I can't get up! I can't get up! Help me! Help me!
Jenwirder: C'mon Charlie! C'mon Charlie! Get your feet outta the water! Get
your feet out! Atta boy Charlie, atta boy.
Charlie: Can we go home now?
Hendricks: So then Jenwirder and Charlie sat there trying to catch their
breath. And figure out how to tell Charlie's wife what happened to her
freezer full of meat.
Martin: That's not funny, that's not funny at all.
Hendricks: Mrs. Kintner must have put her ad in Field and Stream.
Martin: It looks more like the National Inquirer.
Martin: All right, all right, hold it, hold it, hold it. Just, just, just,
Ben Gardner: Hello back... young feller. How are ya? Say I hope you not going
out with those nuts are ya?
Martin: Lady would ya? The weak top boat's gotta move out first. You have to
move out or he can't get out at all!
Hooper: Boys, boys. Don't raise sail, your just going to luff with it. Do you
have a paddle on the boat?
Fisherman: Yeah I got a paddle.
Hooper: So scull outta here.
Hooper: Officer, officer! Wait a second, wait a second! Just --
Martin: Hey! How many guys are you going to put aboard that boat!
Martin: Yeah? Well that ain't safe!
Hooper: Easy! Watch it, that's dynamite.
Martin: Hey, what you gonna...what are you doing with that? Where are you
going with that?!
Fisherman: I going on the boat.
Martin: Oh no, no, no! Please, please. Help get those guys out of the boat,
will ya please?
Hooper: Sure. Gentlemen, gentlemen?! The officer asked me to tell you that
your overloading that boat.
Fishermen: Ah, get outta here! You ain't going there, what do you care? Hold
Hooper: Well then, can you tell me if there's a good restaurant or hotel on
Fisherman: Yeah ya walk straight ahead! Ha ha!
Hooper: Ha ha they're all gonna die.
Martin: Polly, listen to me. We got some road block signs outside. Now you..
you... you gotta get somebody to help us. Yeah get those, get those road
block signs out on the highway. Because we got more people down here than we
Martin: What are you doing out there? These are your people, go and talk to
Hendricks: Those aren't my people! They're from all over the place! Did you
see all the license plates out in the parking lot? Connecticut, Rhode Island,
New Jersey. I'm all by myself out there! Um, what happened to the extra help
we were supposed to be get?
Martin: That's not until the fourth of July! Between now and then it's you
Hooper: Ah, you know those eight guys in the fan-tail launch out there?
Hooper: Well none of them are going to get out of the harbour alive.
Martin: Lenny, that's what I'm talking about. You know their first names!
Talk to those clowns!
Hooper: Everybody seems to be having a really good time today.
Martin: Tell me about it. Polly, I'll get back to you.
Hooper: Listen, could you tell me how I could find chief Brody?
Martin: Who are you?
Hooper: Matt Hooper. I'm from the, uh, Oceanographic Institute.
Martin: Oh for Christ's sakes! You're the guy we called. I'm Brody, I'm Brody!
Hooper: Oh ho ho ho, very glad to meet you.
Martin: Yea I'm glad to meet you too!
Hooper: Listen, I know you got a lot on your hands right now but uh...
Martin: What can we do for you?
Hooper: Well I think the best thing for me to do is uh...see the remains of
the first victim; the girl on the beach?
Martin: Okay fine. Just bear with me will ya?
OUTSIDE HARBOUR ON OCEAN
Gardner: When we get them silly bastards down in that rock pile, it'll be
some fun, they'll wish their fathers had never met their mothers; when they
start takin' their bottoms out and slamming into them rocks boy! -- Get away
from there ya God damn fool you! What's the matter with you? You wanna swamp
us ya crazy son of a bitch!?
Fishermen: What are you doing? What are these guys doing out here? What are
they doin' back there man?! Tell us what in the hell are they doing back
there then!? There chummin' right now. Chumming what in the hell's that?
Their tricking the sharks out. Ten thousand dollars divided four ways is
what? Watch your starboard! Jesus!
MEDICAL EXAMINER'S ROOM
Martin: Let's show Mr. Hooper our, uh, hex. Here.
Hooper: Ah, victim identified as Christine Watkins. Female Caucasian.
Martin: Yeah now, now here's where we have it.
Hooper: Probable boating accident.
Hooper: The height and weight of the victim can only be estimated from the
partial remains. The torso has been severed in mid-thorax. There are no major
organs remaining. May I have a glass of water please? Right arm has been
severed, above the elbow with massive tissue loss in the upper musculature.
Thank you very much. Partially denuded bone remaining, this was no boat
accident. Did you notify the coast guard about this?
Martin: No. It was only local jurisdiction.
Hooper: The left arm, head to shoulders, sternum and portions of the rib cage
are intact. Do not smoke in here! Thank you very much. So this is what
happens. Indicates the non-frenzy feeding of a large squalus possibly
Unjumanus or Isurus Glaucous. Now, the enormous amount of tissue loss prevents
any detailed analysis however the attacking squalus must be considerably
larger than any normal squalus found in these waters. Didn't you get on the
phone to check out these waters?
Hooper: Well this is not a boat accident! It wasn't any propeller! It wasn't
any coral reef! And it wasn't Jack the Ripper! It was a shark.
Meadows: Listen Jenny, I wanna go AP and UPI. I wanna get on the state wire
see if Boston will pick it up and go national. Call Dave Axlrod in New York,
tell him he owes me a favour. Now this is the shot I want, with everybody and
the fish in it. Guys could we please get organized?! I want to get a picture
for the paper! Now can we just have the guys --
Martin: Ben Gardner get this?
Fisherman: Nah, nah, nah, nah, we caught it. We got it! We got him!
Martin: Congratulations! That's swell! That's swell! Thanks a lot!
Fisherman: We got it! It's a beauty, ain't it?
Meadows: Okay guys! Please, I need a picture for the paper! Come on, clear
out of the way please! Just the guys that caught the fish, could just, open
it up a little bit please?! I want to get a picture with the guy with the
fish?! Come on guys! Come on please?! I need a picture for the paper! Can we
get the sign please? Beach closed sign! Please?! Come on I wanna take this
shot! Kneel down, just like in high school. One row kneeling, one row
standing. Come on just, just get out of the way!! Young fella could you step
out of the picture?
Fishermen: Hey! Take your with ya! Here we go, here we go, we're
Meadows: Thank you.
Fisherman: We're ready.
Meadows: Can you get that please? How's that?
Martin: Larry! Larry you won't believe it!
Fisherman: What kind of shark is it?
Fisherman: I dunno, I think it's a mako.
Fisherman: With a deep throat !
Fisherman: Yeah but what kind? What kind of shark?
Hooper: Tiger shark.
Fisherman: A what?
Vaughn: Hey, we can start breathing again! Ben getting plenty of pictures for
Martin: Oh, you bet he is!
Fisherman: What is this bite radius crap?!
Fisherman: That is a big mouth! Look at it!
Hooper: All I'm trying to tell you is --
Fisherman: Why don't you stuff your friggin' head in there, man, and find out
if it's a man-eater! All right?!
Hooper: I'm not saying it's not the shark, I am saying is that it may not be
the shark. It's just a slight difference in semantics but I don't want to get
beaten up for it.
Martin: Oh and I want you to meet, uh, Matt... Matt, this is Larry Vaughn our
Martin: Matt, from the Oceanographic Institute.
Hooper: Nice to meet you. Can I talk to you for a second?
Background: Terrific uh mayor?
Hooper: Martin, there are all kinds of sharks in the waters you know? Hammer
heads, white tips, blues, makos and the chances that these bozos got the
exact shark --
Martin: Oh! Now there's no other sharks like this in these waters!
Hooper: Martin, Martin, it's a hundred to one. A hundred to one. Now I'm not
saying that this not the shark --
Martin: Come on!
Hooper: It probably is Martin, it probably is! It's a man-eater, it's
extremely rare for these waters, but the fact is the bite radius on this
animal is different than the wounds on the victim. I just, I want to be sure.
You want to be sure. We all want to be sure. Okay? Now what I want to do is
very simple. This digestive system of this animal is very, very slow. Let's
cut it open, what ever its eaten in the last 24 hours is bound to still be in
there. And then we'll be sure.
Martin: May be the only way to confirm it.
Vaughn: Now look fellas. Let's be reasonable, huh? This is not the time or
the place to perform some kind of a half ass autopsy on a fish! And I am not
going to stand here and see that thing cut open and see that little Kintner
boy spill out all over the dock!
Mrs. Kintner: Chief Brody?
Mrs. Kintner: I just found out, that the girl got killed here last week, and
you knew it! You knew there was a shark out there! You knew it was dangerous!
But you let people go swimming anyway?! You knew all those things! But still
my boy is dead now. And there's nothing you can do about it. My boy is dead.
I wanted you to know that.
Vaughn: I'm sorry Martin, she's wrong.
Martin: No she's not.
Vaughn: All right fellas, let's cut this ugly son of a bitch down before it
stinks up the whole island. Harv, you and Carl take it out tomorrow and dump
it in the drink.
BRODY'S DINING ROOM
Martin: Come here. Give us a kiss.
Martin: `Cause I need it. Get outta here.
Ellen: Hello? Can I help you?
Hooper: The door was open, mind if I come in? I'm Matt Hooper.
Ellen: Oh! Hi! Ellen Brody.
Hooper: Your husband's home.
Ellen: Yes, he is.
Hooper: I'd really like to talk to him.
Ellen: Ah, yes. So would I. Ah, come in. Come in. Can I get you some coffee?
Would you like something to drink?
Hooper: No, no, nothing thank you, thank you.
Ellen: Oh, wine. How nice.
Hooper: So how was your day?
Hooper: Yeah. I got, uh, red and white. I didn't know what you would be
Ellen: Oh, that's nice.
Hooper: Is anyone eating this?
Ellen: No... My husband tells me your in sharks.
Hooper: Ahem, excuse me. Well yes I've, I've never heard it quite put that
way. But, uh, yes I am. I love sharks.
Ellen: You love sharks?
Hooper: Yeah, I love them. When I was twelve years old my father got me this
boat. And I went fishing off of cape cod, and I hooked a scup and as I was
reeling it in I hooked a four and a half foot baby thrasher shark. Who
proceeded to eat my boat. Heh, heh, he ate my uh, oar hooks and uh my seat
cushions, he turned an inboard into an outboard scared me to death and I swam
back to shore. And when I was on the beach, I turned around I actually saw my
boat being taken apart and ever since then I, yes, I have been studying
sharks and that's why I know that uh I'm gonna go to the institute tomorrow
and tell them you still have a shark problem here.
Martin: Why would have to tell them that?
Ellen: I'm sorry, I thought uh, you told me the shark was caught, and I, I
heard it on the news, I heard it on the Cape station.
Hooper: They caught a shark, not the shark. Not the shark that killed
Chrissie Watkins and probably not the shark that killed the little boy, which
I wanted to prove today by cutting the shark open -- but you, you may want to
let that breath for... nothing, nothing.
Hooper: You know uh, you're going to be the only rational man left on this
island after I leave tomorrow.
Ellen: Where are you going?
Hooper: I'm going on the Aurora.
Ellen: The Aurora? What is that?
Hooper: It's a floating asylum for uh, shark uh, . Pure research.
Eighteen months at sea.
Ellen: Martin hates the boats. Martin hates water, Martin, Martin sits in his
car when we go on the ferry to the mainland. I guess it's a childhood thing,
it's uh, there's a clinical name for it, isn't there?
Martin: Drowning. Listen, is it true that most people that get attacked by
sharks in three feet of water? About ten feet from the beach?
Martin: And that, and that, and that before people started to swim for
recreation, uh, I mean before sharks knew what they were missing, that a lot
of these attacks weren't reported.
Hooper: That's right.
Martin: Now this shark that, that, that swims alone...
Martin: What's it called?
Martin: Rogue. Rogue. Yeah, now this guy, he, he keeps swimming around in a
place where the feeding is good, until the food supply is gone, right?
Hooper: Yeah, it's called territoriality. It's just a theory that I happen to
Martin: Then why don't we have one more drink and go down and cut that shark
Ellen: Martin? Can you do that?
Martin: I can do anything. I'm the chief of police.
Hooper: We start in the elementary canal... and open the digestive tract.
Just like I thought --
Hooper: He came up in the gulf stream... from southern waters.
Martin: He didn't eat a car did he?
Hooper: No, heh heh heh, a tiger shark's like a garbage can, they'll eat
anything. Someone probably threw that in a river. Ah, hoo, that's it.
Martin: Better close the beach, call the mayor.
Hooper: You've got a bigger problem than that Martin, you still got a hell of
a fish out there, with a mouth about this big.
Martin: How do we confirm that by morning?
Hooper: If he is a rogue and there's any truth to territoriality at all,
we've got a good chance of spotting him between Cape Scott and South Beach.
Martin: Where you going?
Hooper: Were going to find him right now, he's a night feeder.
Martin: On the water?
Hooper: Well if we're looking for a shark, we're not going to him on the land.
Martin: Yeah, but I'm not drunk enough to go out on a boat.
Hooper: Yes, you are.
Martin: No I'm not.
Hooper: Yes, you are.
Martin: I can't do that.
Hooper: Yes, you can.
Martin: I'm telling ya, the crime rate in New York will kill ya. There's so
many problems, you never feel like your accomplishing anything. Violence,
rip-offs, muggings, kids can't leave the house, you gotta walk `em to school.
But in Amity, one man can make a difference. In twenty five years, there's
never been a shooting or murder in this town.
Hooper: do you want a pretzel?
Martin: Where are we?
Hooper: We're right in the stretch where he's been feeding.
Martin: Do you get the late show on this thing?
Hooper: No, it's a closed circuit t.v. system. I have underwater cameras fore
Martin: Who pays for all this stuff? The government? The institute? This
stuff costs a lot of money.
Hooper: Well I, uh, I paid for this mostly myself actually.
Martin: You're kidding.
Martin: You rich?
Martin: Yeah? How much?
Hooper: Well personally or the whole family?
Martin: Doesn't make any sense? You mean they pay a guy like you to watch
Hooper: Well, uh, it doesn't make much sense for a guy who hates the water to
live on an island either.
Martin: It's only an island if you look at it from the water.
Hooper: That makes a lot of sense.
Martin: What is that thing doing?
Hooper: Well it's uh, it's a fish finder. It's probably just a school of
mackerel or something all flocked together. Wait a minute. There's something
else out there.
Martin: What is it?
Hooper: About a hundred yards, south south west.
Martin: Ben Gardner's boat. That's Ben Gardner's boat.
Hooper: You know him?
Martin: It's all banged up. Sure I know him, he's a fisherman. What happened?
Hooper: Look Martin, I gotta go down there and check their hull.
Martin: Wait a minute, why don't we just tow it all in?
Hooper: We will, we will! I just gotta check something out. Hit the lights
Martin: Let's tow it in.
Hooper: Don't worry Martin, nothing's gonna happen.
Martin: What am I suppose to do while your gone?
Hooper: Nothing, absolutely nothing. Don't touch any of the equipment. I'll
be back in two minutes.
Martin: This is a Great White Larry, a big one! And any shark expert in the
world will tell you it's a killer! It's a man-eater!
Hooper: Look the situation, is that apparently a Great White shark has staked
a claim in the waters off Amity Island. And he's going to continue to feed
here as long as there is food in the water.
Martin: And there's no limit to what he's gonna do! I mean we've already had
three incidents, two people killed inside of a week. And it's gonna happen
again, it happened before! The Jersey beach!
Hooper: 1916. There were--
Martin: 1916! Five people chewed up on the surf!
Hooper: In one week!
Martin: Tell him, tell him about the swimmers!
Hooper: A shark is attracted to the exact kind of splashing and activity that
occurs whenever human beings go in swimming. You cannot avoid it.
Martin: If you open the beaches on the fourth of July, it's like ringing the
dinner bell for Christ's sakes!
Hooper: Look Mr. Vaughn. Mr. Vaughn. I pulled a tooth the size of a shot
glass out of the wreck tow of a boat out there and it was the tooth of a
Martin: It was Ben Gardner's boat, it was all chewed up. I helped tow it in,
you sh-- you should have seen him!
Vaughn: Where, where is that tooth. Did you see it Brody?
Martin: No I didn't see it, he, he dropped it. We had a little accident on
the way in.
Hooper: I had an accident.
Vaughn: And what did you say the name of this shark is?
Hooper: It's a carcharodon carcharias. It's a Great White!
Vaughn: But you, you don't have the tooth. Look we depend on the summer
people here for our very lives.
Hooper: You are not going to have a summer unless you deal with this problem!
Vaughn: And if you close those beaches, we're finished!
Martin: We're not only gonna have to close the beach, we're gonna have to
hire somebody to kill the shark! I mean, we're gonna have to tell the coast
guard. We're gonna have to get shark repellent!
Hooper: Mr. you have to contract a shark research panel.
Martin: We're gonna have to put extra deputies on because there ain't nothing
in the world that's gonna come in here! We've gotta spend money to save what
Hooper: You have to ring this entire harbour with 100 gauge--
Vaughn: I don't think either one of you are familiar with our problems!
Hooper: Uh, I think that I am familiar the fact that you are going to ignore
this particular problem until it swims up and bites you in the ass! Now wait
a second, wait a second!
Vaughn: Chief? Hey Chief?
Hooper: There are two ways to deal with this problem. You either gonna kill
this animal or your gonna cut off its food supply.
Martin: Larry we have to close the beaches.
Vaughn: Brody? Sick vandalism. That is a deliberate mutilation of a public
service message. Now I want those little paint-happy bastards caught and hung
up by their Buster Browns!
Hooper: That's it! Good-bye! I'm not going to waste my time arguing with a
man who is lining up to be a hot lunch. I'm gonna see you later Brody.
Martin: Aw, now please don't do this, he's not...
Hooper: Mr. Vaughn, what we are dealing with here is a perfect engine, ah, an
eating machine. It's really a miracle of evolution. All this machine does is
swim and eat and make little sharks. And that's all. Now why don't you take a
long close look at this sign. Those proportions are correct.
Vaughn: Love to prove that wouldn't ya? Get your name into the National
Hooper: Ha ha ha ha ha.
Martin: Larry, Larry, if we make an effort today, we might be able to save
Vaughn: August? Heh, for Christ's sake tomorrow is the fourth of July! And we
will be open for business. It's gonna be one of the best summer we ever had!
Now if you fellas are concerned about the beaches, you do whatever you have
to , to make them safe. But those beaches will be open for this weekend!
Martin: Okay, now I want to know how many men you're gonna send me.
Hooper: Doctor, doctor, there is no need for me to come to Grisbane when I
have a Great White shark right here!
Martin: I'm telling ya we need men to patrol the swimming area! We've gotta
have help, anybody with a gun or a boat.
Martin: Monday?! Listen is Chief Perkoserfilm in there?
Hooper: Mishkin, Mishkin is the guy that feeds the white mice.
Sean: Dad, dad?
Martin: What?! He's the little guy with the crew cut.
Hooper: Operator? Isn't there a phone on the island? Could you connect me
Martin: How can you go up there when he's not in chambers?
Meadows: That's the t.v. station on the mainland here.
Martin: Oh, all right, I'll get to them later. Please --- Brody to Scup
Bucket please come in. Okay. Brody to Daisy. do you read me? Come
in over? What do you see?
Hooper: Nothing here Martin. And nothing on sonar.
Interviewer: Amity island has long been known for its clean air, clear water
and beautiful white sand beaches. But in recent days, a cloud has appeared on
the horizon of this beautiful resort community. A cloud in the shape of a
Old Man: Oh hi Larry.
Vaughn: Why aren't you in the water?
Old Man: Er, well er, I just put some sun tan lotion on and uh, I'm trying to
absorb some of this sun.
Vaughn: Nobody's going in! Please. Get in the water.
Martin: Mike come here. Listen Mike. Do me a favour will ya?
Martin: You and the other guys take the boat and put it in the pond instead?
Michael: The pond's for old ladies!
Martin: I know it's for the old ladies but just do it for the old man, huh?
Michael: All right.
Sean: Michael! Wait! Michael! Wait! Michael I don't want you to go in the
Hendricks: Daisy? Daisy? This is Hendricks, anything? Thought I saw a shadow,
over? False alarm. Must be this glare.
Vaughn: I'm pleased and happy to repeat the news that we have in fact, caught
and killed a large predator that supposedly injured some bathers. But as you
see it's a beautiful day, the beaches are open and people are having a
wonderful time. Amity as you know means friendship.
Bather: Oh my God!
Spotter: Jesus Christ! Fad shark three-five-zero!!
Hooper: Red one! Red one! Martin! Get the people out of the water!
Martin: No whistles, no whistles!
Hooper: Everybody please get out of the water. Everybody out of the water
Announcer: Don't push! Everybody out of the water, please.
Prankster: He made me do it! He talked me into it!
Martin: Please, please, move back. Let's move back please? Give these people
some air. Please move back, move back.
Hooper: Martin, it's just a hoax. There are two kids with a cardboard fin. Is
everyone there okay? Did everyone get out of the water all right?
Painter: Sh-- Shark! The shark! He's going into the pond! The shark's in the
Martin: Now what!
Ellen: Michael's in the pond!
Painter: In the estuary! The shark's in the pond! He's going in the pond!
Somebody do something! In the pond! In the pond! Shark! In the pond!
Kid #1: Hurry up, get that done.
Kid #2: I can't do a damn thing until we get this undone! I'm doin' it!
Kid #1: Get that rope undone! You gotta untangle that up there!
Scout Leader: Hey fellas! Fellas! the sheet. Make it fast.
Painter: The shark's in the pond!
Scout Leader: Guys? You guys o.k. over there?
Painter: In the pond!
Background: Somebody get a gun! Get a gun and shoot it! Does anybody have a
Ellen: Michael! -- He's dead!
Martin: No he's not. He's in shock.
Ellen: Michael! Michael!
Nurse: Doctor said he's o.k., mild shock. He can go home in the morning.
Ellen: Thank you. Hey! How's my big kid?
Michael: I'm all right.
Ellen: You are. You gonna miss me tonight? You can watch television. Want me
to bring anything from home?
Michael: My cars.
Ellen: Your cars! What about ice cream?
Martin: Do you want to take him home?
Ellen: Back to New York?
Martin: No. Home here.
Vaughn: I'm sorry Martin. I'm sorry... I, I... I'm truly sorry.
Martin: You got a pen Larry?
Martin: You got a pen!? You know?! `Cause your gonna do what you do best!
Your gonna sign this voucher, so I can hire a contractor.
Vaughn: I ca-- I don't, I don't know if I can do that without the clearance.
Martin: You're gonna hire Quint to kill the shark.
Vaughn: Aug-- August...
Martin: What? What? What are you talking about? Larry, the summer is over!
You're the mayor of shark city! These people think you want the beaches open!
Vaughn: I was, I was, I was acting in the, in the town's best interest. I
thought I was acting in the town's best interest.
Martin: That's right you were acting in the town's best interest. And that's
why your going to do the right thing! That's why you're gonna sign this and
we're gonna pay that guy what he wants!
Vaughn: Martin, Martin. My kids were on that beach too!
Martin: Sign it Larry.
Quint: Ten thousand dollars. Two hundred dollars a day, either I catch him or
Martin: You got it.
Quint: Get the mayor of my back! So I don't have any more of this zoning
Martin: You got that.
Quint: One case of apricot brandy. You buy the lunch.
Martin: Two cases. You get dinner when you get back.
Quint: Champagne, , Uranian caviar, and don't forget the colour t.v.
Hey chief! You try this, made it myself! Pretty good stuff!
Quint: Here's to swimmin' with bow legged women. Excuse me chief. Can't get a
good man these days for under 60! They're all goin' at least 35 years! 45
year olds with women!
Martin: Don't drink that. Mr. Quint!
Hooper: Mr. Quint! You're gonna need an extra hand.
Martin: This is Matt Hooper.
Quint: I know who he is.
Hooper: I've crewed three transpacs.
Martin: No, no no he's from the Oceanographic Institute.
Hooper: And an American's Cup trial.
Quint: Mr. Hooper, I'm not talkin' about pleasure boatin' or daily sailin'.
I'm talkin' about workin' for a livin'. I'm talkin' about sharkin'!
Hooper: Well I'm not talkin' about hooking some poor dogfish or sandshark.
I'm talking about finding a Great White!
Quint: Porkers! Talkin' about porkers! Mr. Hooper. Just tie me a sheep shank.
Hooper: I haven't had to pass basic seamanship in a long time. You didn't say
how short you wanted it. How's that?!
Quint: Give me your hands. Dogfish? When you got a 5000 dollars net, you got
2000 dollars worth of fisherman. And along comes Mr. Whitey, by the time he's
finished with that net, it looks like a kiddy's scissor class has cut it up
for a paper doll! You got city hands, Mr. Hooper. You've been counting money
all your life.
Hooper: All right! All right! Hey! I, I don't need this! I don't need this
working class hero crap!
Martin: You, you, you're not gonna do this aboard the ship are you, Mr. Quint?
Quint: Maybe I should go alone.
Martin: Well it's my party, it's my charter.
Quint: Yeah, it's your charter, it's your party, it's my vessel! You're on
board my vessel, mate, master, pilot and I'm captain. Take him for ballast
Martin: You got him.
Quint: , straight-jet, killin' lance. pair of robi splice with M1
with three-d clip, handy billy, pliers, lance...
Aid: Haven't even assembled all these die markers, flares, safety flutes,
temperature gauge, spear guns, SMG --
Quint: What are ya, some kind of half-ass astronaut? Heh, heh, heh. Take that
you latch it secure. ? Jesus-H Christ. When I was a boy,
every little squirt wanted to be a harpooner or a sword fisherman. Whatta ya
got here. Portable shar or a monkey cage?
Hooper: Anti-shark cage.
Quint: Anti-shark cage. You go inside the cage? Cage goes in the water? You
go in the water? Shark's in the water, our shark. Farewell and adieu to you
fair Spanish ladies. Farewell and adieu to you ladies of Spain. For we've
received orders for to sail back to Boston. And so nevermore shall we be
seeing you again.
Ellen: Did you take your Dramamine?
[Quint rambling on in background]
Ellen: I put an extra pair of glasses in your-- black socks and, and there's
the stuff, your nose, the zinc oxide, the blistex is in the kit.
Quint: -- Son of a bitch! God damn women today, they can't handle nothin'.
Young girls just quite as smart, like their grandmother's...[Continues his
Ellen: That's got to be Quint.
Martin: Colourful ain't he.
Ellen: He scares me.
Martin: Don't use the fireplace in the den because I haven't fixed the flu
Ellen: What am I going to tell the kids?
Martin: Tell them I'm going fishing.
Quint: Break it up will ya chief! Daylight's wastin'! Front, bow, back, stern.
You don't get it right, squirt, I throw your ass out the little round window
on the side! Come on chief, this isn't no boy scout picnic! I see you got
your rubbers! Ha ha ha! Here lies the fire Mary Lee, died at the age of a
hundred and three, for fifteen years she kept her virginity. Not a bad record
for this vicinity! All right commissioner, fasten your safety belts, ha ha
ha! If you see a shark Hooper, swalla! Ha ha ha!
[While driving away, Quint teases Brody]
OUT ON THE SEA
Quint: Keep that chum line going chief, we got five good miles on him.
Martin: Who's drivin' this boat?
Quint: Nobody, we're tied. One time I caught a sixteen footer off Montog.
Had to stick two barrels in him. Two to wear him down and bring him up. Now a
days, these kids, they bring everything. Radar, sonar, electric toothbrushes.
Jesus-H Christ. Hey chief! Best drop another chum marker.
Hooper: Watch it! Damn it, Martin! This is compressed air!
Martin: Well what the hell kind of a knot was that!
Hooper: You pulled the wrong one! You screw around with these tanks and
they're going to blow up!
Quint: Yeah, that's real fine expensive gear you brought out here, Mr.
Hooper! `Course I don't know what that bastard shark's gonna do with it,
might eat it I suppose. Seen one eat a rockin' chair one time. Hey chieffy,
next time you just ask me which line to pull, right? -- Little brown eel
comes out of the cave, swims into the hole, comes outta the hole and goes
back into the cave again. It's not too good is it chief! Well nothin's easy
is it? One more time.
Martin: Little brown eel... comes out of the hole... goes back in again...
Martin: Hey! I got it! What?
Quint: Get behind me! Hooper! Reverse her! Takin' a hell of a lotta line!
Chief! Get the scooper out of the bucket! Wet the reel! Hooper! Reverse her!
Duck your head down chief! We're swingin', get behind me again! No more
water, it only'll drown me! Hooper, you idiot! Starboard! Ain't you watchin'
it?! Hooper, neutral! Where'd he go now? And he ain't foolin' me! What's he
makin' out now? Go on, try it! I don't know chief, I don't know. He's very
smart or very dumb. Jesus Chr-- He's gone under. He's gone under the boat, I
think he's gone under the boat. Yeah, it's too easy. He's a smart big fish!
He's gone under the boat! Keep it steady now! I got something very big!
Hooper: I don't think so.
Quint: Chief... chief... put your gloves on! Hey, put your gloves on, both of
ya! Gettin' ready to run at again.
Hooper: Hey Quint, let it go.
Quint: Hey Hooper? Maybe your a big yahoo on the land but out here your just
supercargo. If you don't want to backstroke home, you get down here!
Hooper: All right, you don't want to listen to me? Don't listen to me. It's
not a shark.
Martin: The wire's showing! The wire's showing!
Quint: Unbuckle me! Get on the other side. Grab the reel Hooper.
Hooper: Tuna or a swordfish. Wastin' our time!
Quint: Okay, take this rod. Hooper? Give the chief a hand, will ya?
Martin: Oh! Shit!
Hooper: It might be a marlin or a stingray but it's definitely a game fish!
Quint: Gamin' fish eh? Marlin? Stingray? Bit through this piano wire? Don't
you tell me my business again! You get back on the bridge.
Hooper: Quint, that doesn't prove a damn thing.
Quint: Well it proves one thing Mr. Hooper. I proves that you wealthy college
boys don't the education enough to admit when you're wrong.
Martin: What's the point? Hooks and lines.
Quint: Well, you lose one, you rig one. Hooper?! Twelve minutes south south
east, now, full throttle!
Hooper: Aye, aye sir! Arrghgeemoyarrgh!
Quint: See what I do, chief, is I... trick him to the surface, then I jab at
him! I'm not gonna... haul him up like a load of catfish. Hooper! Full
Hooper: I don't have to take this abuse much longer!
Martin: Hey, your head's bleedin'! First aid there.
Quint: Brody?! Start that chum line again, will ya?!
Martin: Let Hooper take a turn.
Quint: Hooper drives the boat, chief. Stop playin' with yerself Hooper; slow
ahead, if you please.
Martin: You heard him, slow ahead! -- Slow ahead! I can go slow ahead! C'mon
down and chum some of this shit! -- You're gonna need a bigger boat.
Quint: Shut off that engine.
Hooper: That's a twenty footer!
Quint: Twenty five! And three tons of him!
Martin: You're gonna need a bigger boat, right?
Quint: Gotta get to work.
Martin: How do we handle this? How do we handle this?
Hooper: Martin, I need you. He's circling the boat! The size of
CB Radio: Amity Point Life Station to Orca. This is Amity Point Life Station
to Orca. Come in Orca?
Quint: Orca, come in.
CB Radio: I have Mrs. Martin Brody here.
Quint: Put her on.
Hooper: Come on Martin! Martin, move, move, move!
Martin: I'm not goin' out there!
Hooper: Beyond the edge of the barrels! Go to the end of the barrels! Further
Hooper: Further out!
Hooper: Go further out!
Martin: What for?!
Hooper: Would you go to the end of the pulpit, please?!
Hooper: Would you, please, go to the end of the pulpit?!
Martin: What for?!
Hooper: I need to have something in the foreground to give it some scale!
Martin: Foreground my ass!
Quint: Your husband's all right, Mrs. Brody. He's fishin'. He's just caught a
couple of stripers. We'll bring `em home for dinner, we won't be long, we
ain't see anything yet, over and out!
Hooper: I need... Martin, please!
Martin: I'm staying here!
Hooper: I'm begging you! Martin, God damn it! Come here darlin'! Come here
Quint: Chief. Want you to get up on the bridge, just take her forward steady.
Martin: I've never steered a boat in my life!
Quint: Just watch my hand and take her steady. Mr. Hooper? Attach the end of
this line to the first keg.
Better get a good shot at that porker's head! Coming. Hee hee hee! Coming!
Hooper? You clearing the barrel? Hooper?! Tie it up will ya?!
Hooper: Your turn, Quint.
Quint: Hooper, where are you? Hooper, hurry it up now, tie it on. Hurry up,
he's coming straight for us, don't screw it up now!
Hooper: Don't wait for me!
Quint: Come on Hooper! Come on! Hurry up! Tie it on!
Martin: Now! Kill it Quint! Kill it! Now!
Hooper: Shoot! Time!
Quint: What were you doing?! You knew I had to get a clean shot, right in the
head! All right! Let's see how long that barrel takes to bring him up!
Hooper: Bring another barrel! I'm coming around again!
Martin: Wh--what do we do now? We quittin' right?
Quint: We've got one barrel on him. So we stay out here, till we find him
Martin: Yeah but we can radio in and get a bigger boat --
Quint: Chief. Don't you worry about it, chief. I won't be permanent. You
wanna see somethin' permanent? Bababoom? Hey, Hoop? You wanna feel somethin'
permanent? Just put your hand underneath my cap. You just feel that little
lump? Knockanolum. St. Patty's day. Boston.
Hooper: I got that beat. I got that beat. It's a moray eel. Bit right through
Quint: Well, Hoop, now, listen. I, I don't know about that but I ended an arm
wrestling contest in an Oke bar in San Francisco. You see this? Now I can't
extend that, do you know why? Get to the semi-final, celebrating my third
wife Demise, big Chinese fella, he pulled me right over! Ha!
Hooper: Look at that. It's a bull shark. He s--, he scraped me when I was
Quint: I got somethin' for ya. That's the thrasher. You see that? Chief,
thrasher's tail. Scewp!
Hooper: It's a shark!
Quint: Do you want a drink? Drink to your leg?
Hooper: I'll drink to your leg.
Quint: Okay, so we drink to our legs! Ha ha ha!
Hooper: I got the creme de la creme. Right here. Hold on. Yeah, you see that?
Martin: You're wearing a sweater.
Hooper: Right there. Mary Ellen Moffit. She broke my heart. [Collective
Martin: What's that one?
Martin: That one, there, on your arm?
Quint: Ah, well. It's a tattoo. I got that removed.
Hooper: Don't tell me. Don't tell me. Mother. Ha ha ha! What is it?
Quint: Mr. Hooper, that's the U.S.S. Indianapolis.
Hooper: You were on the Indianapolis?
Martin: What happened?
Quint: Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes into our side, chief. It was
comin' back, from the island of Tinian Delady, just delivered the bomb. The
Hiroshima bomb. Eleven hundred men went into the water. Vessel went down in
twelve minutes. Didn't see the first shark for about a half an hour. Tiger.
Thirteen footer. You know, you know that when you're in the water, chief? You
tell by lookin' from the dorsal to the tail. Well, we didn't know. `Cause our
bomb mission had been so secret, no distress signal had been sent. Huh huh.
They didn't even list us overdue for a week. Very first light, chief. The
sharks come cruisin'. So we formed ourselves into tight groups. You know
it's... kinda like `ol squares in battle like a, you see on a calendar, like
the battle of Waterloo. And the idea was, the shark nearest man and then he'd
start poundin' and hollerin' and screamin' and sometimes the shark would go
away. Sometimes he wouldn't go away. Sometimes that shark, he looks right
into you. Right into your eyes. You know the thing about a shark, he's got...
lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eye. When he comes at ya, doesn't
seem to be livin'. Until he bites ya and those black eyes roll over white.
And then, ah then you hear that terrible high pitch screamin' and the ocean
turns red and spite of all the poundin' and the hollerin' they all come in
and rip you to pieces. Y'know by the end of that first dawn, lost a hundred
men! I don't know how many sharks, maybe a thousand! I don't know how many
men, they averaged six an hour. On Thursday mornin' chief, I bumped into a
friend of mine, Herbie Robinson from Cleveland. Baseball player, bosom's
mate. I thought he was asleep, reached over to wake him up. Bobbed up and
down in the water, just like a kinda top. Up ended. Well... he'd been bitten
in half below the waist. Noon the fifth day, Mr. Hooper, a Lockheed Ventura
saw us, he swung in low and he saw us. He'd a young pilot, a lot younger than
Mr. Hooper, anyway he saw us and come in low. And three hours later a big fat
PBY comes down and start to pick us up. You know that was the time I was most
frightened? Waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a lifejacket again. So,
eleven hundred men went in the water, three hundred and sixteen men come out,
the sharks took the rest, June the 29, 1945. Anyway, we delivered the bomb.
Martin: What's that?
Hooper: It's a whale.
Quint: . Farewell and adieu to you fair Spanish ladies. Farewell and adieu to
you ladies of Spain.
Hooper: [Singing] Show me the way to go home. I'm tired and I want to go to
bed. [Quint joins] I had a little drink about an hour ago and it's gone right
to my head. Wherever I may roam, by land or sea or foam. You can always hear
me singin' this song, show me the way to go home, bome bome bome. Show me the
way to go home. Bome bome bome. I'm tired and I want to go to bed. [Brody
joins] I had a little drink about an hour ago and it's gone right to my head.
Wherever I may roam, by land or sea or foam. You can always hear me singin'
Quint: Start the engines. Fire her up!
Hooper: Busted a shaft!
Quint: Chief. Put out the fire will ya? Pump around.
Quint: Everybody on deck.
Hooper: He ate the light.
Martin: Hmm, terrific.
Hooper: Excuse me. Quint, what are you doing? Don't waste your time, Quint!
Quint: What's wrong with this sh-- Jesus Christ! Hooper, take the wheel!
Brody forward deck watch for him!
Hooper: You okay? Hey Martin! You okay?
NEXT DAY - HOOPER & QUINT FIXING ENGINE
Quint: Hey chief! Pull left rudder! Pull your left hand down!
Hooper: I can't! It'll only go about three inches!
Hooper: All the more injectors got scored by the saltwater in the fuel!
Quint: Yeah, the housin's bent you can hear it. Start with that rudder again
will ya? Pull it! Good! Once again now!
Martin: Quint! Quint! Quint! There it is!
Quint: Whatta ya say, chief?!
Martin: The barrel is up! It's right in the stern!
Quint: I think he's right under the keg. Grab the boat, Hoop.
Hooper: Quint, if we can get close enough, I've got things on board that'll
Quint: We just want to goose him up, come on. Okay... when he runs, you drop
that rope or you lose your hands. I've seen fingers torn out at the knuckles.
full of `em. Hey boy! Give it to me a minute! -- Start
the engine! Where are you goin'?
Martin: I'm gonna make a phone call. Hello? Hello? Hello, mayday Orca. Coast
Guard? Coast Guard, this is the Orca do you read me? Coast Guard, this is the
Orca do you?
Quint: Excuse me chief.
Martin: That's great! That's just great!! Now where the hell are we, huh??!!
You're certifiable, Quint! You know that?! You're certifiable!!
Quint: Yah! Yah! Yah!
Martin: You're certifiable!! But I'll tell you this --
Hooper: Boys... Oh, boys! I think he's come back for his noon feeding.
Quint: Hook me up another barrel! Bring it around after him! Full throttle!
Get me right up along side of him!
Hooper: I can't rev it up that high! It's not gonna take it!
Quint: Five degrees port! All right, hold your course! Five degrees port
now... hold your course!
Hooper: Fast fish!
Quint: Watch my arm! You see, watch my hand now! Follow me! Follow me! All
right, you watch him now! Starboard! Starboard! Run him down, Hooper! Run
him down! Run him down! Hold your port! Watch him! Starboard! He's too fast!
Martin: Don't believe it! Two barrels and he's going down again!
Quint: It's incredible!
Martin: They're up again!
Hooper: Now what?!
Martin: Well, why don't we start leading the shark into shore, instead of him
leadin' us out to sea?
Quint: Grab a couple of poles, k? Hang on now, we're goin' round! Get the
starboard! Easy! We're gonna back her up now! You watch those barrels, boys!
Watch `em! All right, get `em and snag `em. Now then, tie `em to the stern
cleats. Brody! Bring it right around the cleat! That's right, it'll lock
itself off! Give him room, Brody! Clear it!
Quint: Get off the line!
Martin: Watch it, stand clear.
Quint: Stand away from those stern cleats! Back home, we get a taxidermy man,
he's gonna have a heart attack when he see what I brung him! Ha ha ha!
Hooper: Crawl back! You're losing a cleat! Look at that mother! My God, this
one too, they're both going!
Martin: He's eating his way right through that line!
Hooper: Yeah! And he's workin' his way, right into us! Quint! C'mon Quint!
Martin: Hey! Come on!
Hooper: Hurry! Quint!
Quint: Outta my way! Watch the tail! Untie us! He'll put out the --
Make it fast! We got another line in him!
Hooper: I can't! It's trying to run!
Quint: We better get another line! Pull you son of a bitch! I hope your back
breaks! Pull it! Rip your bloody heart out! Tie him off! Secure it, boy, tie
Hooper: It's impossible! It's impossible! Boys, it's too tight! He's pullin'
us! You gotta cut him loose or he'll us again! We're breakin' up over here!
Cut it man! It's all hung off!
Martin: We need something to cut it!
Hooper: Get the ax! Get the ax! Get it, get it! Hurry up! We're breakin' up!
We're breakin' up! God! Cut it! Cut it!
Martin: Watch your hands! Watch your hands! Come on hold it!
Hooper: Get th-- Cut it Quint! I can't hold it!
Martin: Cut that cleat!
Hooper: Cut it! Cut it!
Quint: He can't stay down with three barrels on him, not with three barrels
Martin: What about us?
Quint: Hooper, get the pump outta the locker in front of you, will you?
Martin: We're gonna sink aren't we?
Quint: Hooper, keep an eye on the barrels! Pump it out, chief!
Hooper: He's gonna go under!
Quint: I tell ya, he can't with three barrels on him! Not with three he
Hooper: You ever have one do this before?
Quint: I don't know. -- Hold fast!
Hooper: He's chasin' us, I don't believe it!
Quint: We're gonna draw him into the shadows, draw him in the shallow water,
gonna draw him in and drown him. We're headin' in, Brody!
Martin: Thank Christ! Ever have a Great White do this?
Martin: How far do we have to go?!
Hooper: Quint, don't put that much pressure on her! Quint, God damn it!
Quint: Shaddap! Get back there! I break the engine--!
Hooper: It's gonna tear up! Doh! Hold on!
Quint: Farewell and adieu to you fair Spanish ladies. Farewell and adieu to
you ladies of Spain! For we've received orders for to sail back to Boston.
Hooper: You did it! You did it! You burned out the bearings! my
Quint: And so nevermore shall we be --
Martin: All right! Stop the boat! Stop the boat! Stop it!
Quint: Hooper! Chief. -- Hooper, what exactly can you do with these things of
Hooper: Well, I think I can pump twenty cc's of strychnine nitrate into him.
If I can get close enough.
Quint: You get this little needle through his skin?
Hooper: No. I can't do that. But if I can get him close enough to this cage,
I think I can get him in the mouth or --
Martin: That shark will rip that cage to pieces!
Hooper: You got any better suggestions?! -- Easy.
Quint: Easy! All right, up! Up she goes! Ease her down!
[HOOPER IN CAGE]
Hooper: I got no spit. Try to keep him off of me until I'm lower. Okay, okay,
Martin: Bring him up Quint! God damn it! Bring him up now! Pull it up! Pull
it! What is in there?! Bring him up! Bring him up! What are you waiting--
pull him up! C'mon Quint! Bring him in!
Quint: It's giving way!
Martin: Ah! -- C'mon rig somethin'. Rig something. Got it? All right. Bring
him up. He's coming. Lower.
Quint: Ahh! Argh!
ON TOP OF MAST
Martin: All right. All right. All right, come on! Show the tank. Show me the
tank. Blow up! Blow up! Smile you son of a... BITCH!! -- Ah ha ha ha!!!
Martin: Oh! Ha ha ha.
Hooper: Huh huh huh. Quint?
Martin: No. -- Can we get in on those? Hey, what day is this?
Hooper: It's Wednesday, uh, it's Tuesday I think.
Martin: I think the tide's with us.
Hooper: Keep kicking.
Martin: Huh huh, I used to hate the water.
Hooper: Huh huh, I can't imagine why.
- THE END -
According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? - Are they out celebrating? - They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? - What did you want to show me? - This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I'm gonna guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It's notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That's our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course... The human species? So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it? I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? - I'll sting you, you step on me. - Thatjust kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open my mouth and talk. Vanessa? Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry? - Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are. Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That's why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Oould you ask him to slow down? Oould you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. Yes, it kind of is. I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I've made it worse. Actually, it's completely closed down. I thought maybe you were remodeling. But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. I don't want to hear it! All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got. - Bees. - Park. - Pollen! - Flowers. - Repollination! - Across the nation! Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, Oalifornia. They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. Security will be tight. I have an idea. Vanessa Bloome, FTD. Official floral business. It's real. Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. Thank you. It was a gift. Once inside, we just pick the right float. How about The Princess and the Pea? I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! Yes, I got it. - Where should I sit? - What are you? - I believe I'm the pea. - The pea? It goes under the mattresses. - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal. You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! Let's see what this baby'll do. Hey, what are you doing?! Then all we do is blend in with traffic... ...without arousing suspicion. Once at the airport, there's no stopping us. Stop! Security. - You and your insect pack your float? - Yes. Has it been in your possession the entire time? Would you remove your shoes? - Remove your stinger. - It's part of me. I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job. Oan you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! I think this is gonna work. It's got to work. Attention, passengers, this is Oaptain Scott. We have a bit of bad weather in New York. It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it. I gotta get up there and talk to them. Be careful. Oan I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. Oaptain, I'm in a real situation. - What'd you say, Hal? - Nothing. Bee! Don't freak out! My entire species... What are you doing? - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! - Who's an attorney? Don't move. Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious! - Is that another bee joke? - No! No one's flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status? This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. Where's the pilot? He's unconscious, and so is the copilot. Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is. - Who's that? - Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. It's got giant wings, huge engines. I can't fly a plane. - Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot? - Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning. This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory... That's Barry! ...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They've done enough damage. But isn't he your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small... Haven't we heard this a million times? "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense." - Get this on the air! - Got it. - Stand by. - We're going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow! - Hello! Left, right, down, hover. - Hover? - Forget hover. This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. - That may have been helping me. - And now we're not! So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don't have to yell. I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! It's not a tone. I'm panicking! I can't do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it. - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - Hold it! - Why? Oome on, it's my turn. How is the plane flying? I don't know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow. - Hello. All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can't see anything. Oan you? No, nothing. It's all cloudy. Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry. - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. - What? - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - What in the world is on the tarmac? - Get some lights on that! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - Vanessa, aim for the flower. - OK. Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. Land on that flower! Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around! - Not that flower! The other one! - Which one? - That flower. - I'm aiming at the flower! That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it. - This is insane, Barry! - This's the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it. Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Oome on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly! - Yes. No high-five! - Right. Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! - Thank you. - But we're not done yet. Listen, everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our last chance. We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say? Are we going to be bees, orjust Museum of Natural History keychains? We're bees! Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain. Hold on, Barry. Here. You've earned this. Yeah! I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That's our Barry. Mom! The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time. I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Oan I help who's next? Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see a nickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I'm late. He's a lawyer too? I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. You're a lifesaver, Barry. Oan I help who's next? All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. - When will this nightmare end?! - Let it all go. - Beautiful day to fly. - Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. - Thinking bee! - Me? Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Oan we stop here? I'm not making a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. I had virtually no rehearsal for that.
some guest (guest-123) earlier was griefing all over canvas and was drawing d*cks on the canvas
Dead, but alive